Does anyone ever feel this way? Do you think it's an aspect of my personality i cannot change?

cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) will help with this... you can talk to your doctor about it (as you say it is getting in the way of your life) it is worthing taking this step as the doctor is there to help you with physical and mental aspects of your health and s/he may refer you to a cognitive behavioural therapist to work through how to deal with these anxieties... or you could look up CBT on the internet and/or there are lots of self-help books about it. try the ones covering 'low self esteem' and/or 'social anxiety disorder' I think they will be helpful to you (although you need to note that this is not really a quick-fix but does take a bit of work/practice to complete).